Chore Charts and Child Development
October 12th, 2011 - Category: Chores
As you know by now, MyJobChart.com was created as a convenience tool for frustrated parents. Little did we know there were psychological benefits to such a system. For our blog post today, we are excited to share some advice/thoughts from Pediatric Psychologist, Dr. Lynne Kenney.
Dr. Lynne Kenney is a mom of two, a pediatric psychologist and author of The Family Coach Method. She is also a great supporter of MyJobChart.com. You can learn more about Dr. Kenney at www.lynnekenney.com.
Here is what she wrote for us:
If each morning you hear yourself saying, “I said, brush your teeth,” or “I said, make your bed,” consider the value of clear expectations.
Instead of making a battle out of it, consider your approach. Are you clear in what you expect? Have you clarified if the expected action is a personal or family contribution? Do you assert your expectations modeling peace not anger? Are you enhancing family relationships over asserting control?
Teach your children the value of contributions early on by teaching daily routines, tasks and chores. Be clear, be concrete and be consistent.
Teach, model and expect peacefully and calmly, your expectations, posture and tone will guide the outcome.
STEP #1 Identify Daily Routines For Your Children
Helping your children to identify the components of their daily routine is one step toward practicing independence and responsibility.
“We use task lists to keep the children focused on their brief responsibilities each morning,” says Diana from Chicago.
Developing independence takes 1) Knowing the expectation 2) Having the skills to exhibit the expected behavior and 3) Being recognized for the success in order to increase the likelihood of exhibiting the behavior next time.
Establish a daily task routine. Make play dates, sports and family fun dependent on their accomplishing specific tasks. It’s very simple, you give to the family and the family gives back.
STEP #2 Assign Daily and Weekly Chores
Chores are separate from personal tasks (part of a daily routine) as they are done for the good of the community. Chores teach children the value of living in a group, a community, a family.
I look at chores as valued family contributions. When you live in a home where everyone contributes it is a clean, happy well-run home that is enjoyed by all.
Chores are a part of making expected contributions to the household. Children do not earn money for doing what is expected. They are expected to be a productive part of the family, their tasks are a piece of that, just as listening respectfully and being kind are expected.
Susan from Milwaukee offers this advice, “At our house, the kids are expected to help the “family community” for which they do not get paid money. Just as I make their breakfast or dinner and do their laundry, they have ways in which they contribute to the community. Making their bed, wiping the sink after they brush their teeth, setting the dinner table, and clearing their plates from the table are typical every day expectations.”
Jane from Scottsdale agrees. “We have “chores” listed on our fridge, the kids do some each day and some weekly. If we have a big project or something outside the chore list we need done we might offer $2-$5 for that extra activity mostly to support the children’s piggy banks.
“On Saturday there is a pretty good chance that our preschool and school-age children will help out, as they can earn valuable spending money for their participation. This money goes to things they care about like horseback riding, going to the water park and having movie night at home. Without hard work there are no horses and there are no trips to the mall, that’s just the way it is,” Jane says confidently.
STEP #3 Model Your Values
If you are going to give allowance for everyday household tasks, make sure you establish a specific amount, be consistent in giving it out each week and make sure the children complete the tasks assigned to earn allowance.
It is important to also suggest that children do not need to “consume” everything they like. Children can enjoy things in a store and leave them in a store. Life is not about accumulating stuff it’s about caring for people.
Kim from Boston offers some clear advice, “When we go to the store, I do not agree to buy the kids small toys or objects that they can purchase with their allowance. We have a ten dollar per week maximum of allowance earned and they can use that to buy the newest Polly Pocket or Lego toy.”
“Further, they are encouraged to put one dollar in savings and one dollar in our “community jar” to give away at the holidays to families in need. If every child contributes, they often have more than one hundred dollars to give away at the holidays, which teaches them to be compassionate as well as generous. They learn the value of hard work early with a spend, save, and donate system,” asserts Kim.
Consider delineating what are expected family contributions in your home. Create a morning and evening task list for each child. Keep it simple with (3-8) discrete tasks. If you wish to help your children learn about money management, develop a chore list, assign fees, and encourage your children to spend, save and give. Teach your children the value of contributing to the family in the early years.
If you haven’t tried it yet, MyJobChart.com is a great way to manage the tasks and responsibilities of your family members. And the best part is – it’s free!
How to Divide Up Family Chores
August 30th, 2011 - Category: Chores
If your kids are like, well, any other kids in the world, one of their favorite phrases is, “That’s not fair.” And no matter how many times you explain that life is not fair, they will continue to use that phrase as a legitimate argument.
This is very true of doing chores. If you’ve ever had a chore chart before, you understand what I am talking about. One of your children may feel as if they have to clean the bathrooms more often than anyone else. Another child may complain that they have twice the number of chores assigned to them. And still, another child may feel that their chores take longer to complete.
You will never be able to create the perfect chore chart where everyone is happy. (Mostly because kids aren’t real excited about helping with chores.) But maybe there are a few things you can do to make life at your house just a little more “fair”. We’re not going to guarantee that these work, but they’re just some ideas we came up with after working with our own children.
Try to avoid the gender-based chores. If you have a ten-year-old son, then he probably gets assigned the chore of mowing the lawn, right? That’s understandable. Boys tend to be stronger physically than girls. But making boys do “boy chores” and girls do “girl chores” will hardly help your children feel better about their work load. Besides, at some point, both your boys and your girls will be living on their own. They need the experience of being able to do both kinds of chores.
Switch it up. No one wants to do the same chores over and over and over again. As adults, is something we have to deal with. But if vacuuming is easier for your child than doing the laundry, give them a chance to vacuum. As you divide chores among your children, come up with some backup plans, or ways to keep the chores rotating. One additional benefit to switching things up is the change in who is whining. If kid 1 cries about life being unfair today, at least he’ll be on to something new next week.
Divide the tough stuff. How often do we say we’re going to clean out the garage or the attic one day? Those are some difficult chores to tackle. They could take hours, even days to complete. If you have those kinds of chores to be completed, don’t take them on yourself. Your kids can help. But you need to carefully describe what each child should be doing. Otherwise, one person will be completing more work than another and come to you complaining. Divide large chores into smaller chunks and then let the children get started.
Reward greater effort with greater rewards. No amount of parenting is going to make all your children equally reliable or hard working. So try to reward the chores that take the most time with an additional benefit. Also, create a system where you can give extra rewards to children who do an exceptionally fine job on their work.
Let your children see you working. No, you don’t have to add your name to the chore chart (although that’s not a bad idea). But if you work alongside your children, they will be less likely to complain about their own workload. They need to see you working with them to create a clean, pleasant home to work in. It creates a bond between you and your children so they can feel like part of a team instead of like slaves.
Dividing up the chore chart properly is an important part of maintaining your home and your family. Take the time to really evaluate what each child in your family is expected to complete and decide whether they are being treated “fairly” or being sufficiently compensated.
If you don’t have a chore chart that works for you, then you really need to check out MyJobChart.com.
Are Chores Only For Children?
August 9th, 2011 - Category: Chores
As a kid, your parents almost certainly assigned you chores. But…as we are somewhat older now, and technology back then was limited, your chores were probably written on a sheet of paper and taped to the fridge. If you’re a little bit younger than some of us, you may have used the chore chart form that came complete with stickers blank spaces for extra chores to be filled in.
Now, you’ve got your children on some sort of chore system. If you didn’t, you probably would have never found this blog post.
But here is our question to you today – are children the only ones who need a chore chart? Or would you still benefit from putting one together for yourself? Here are a few reasons chore charts are still a great idea whether you’re 10 or 40:
-You can stay more organized. If you’re like many adults, you have a to-do list. But what are you writing on that to-do list? Clean the house? How many different chores are involved in cleaning the house? Or working in the yard? A chore chart would certainly help you decide what things in the house need to be cleaned or what work in the yard needs to be done.
-You can plan ahead. In addition to knowing what needs to be done now, you can plan chores for the future. For example, washing windows or wiping down the baseboards are once-in-a-great-while kind of chores. But they need to be done occasionally. Planning ahead will not only keep your house spotless, but it will make your future plans easier to figure out.
-You can track the work you do. As adults who own our own homes, we have a vested interest in completing our “chores”. But that doesn’t mean it’s easier for us than it is for our children. However, if we track our progress (and even reward ourselves for the work we do) we’ll be much more inclined to get things done.
-You can assign chores more effectively. If there are two adults in the home, dividing up the chores can be rather painful. One adult may feel as though they are primarily managing the workload. A chore chart is a great way to split up the responsibility and make sure both adults are doing their fair share of the work.
Maintaining a home, yard and other personal belongings takes a lot of work. Which is part of the reason getting your children to help with chores makes so much difference in a family. But the same principles that work in keeping your children organized and staying on task can be used for adults.
If you haven’t selected a chore chart method yet, you (and your children) may want to consider MyJobChart.com.
Do Your Children Work Hard Enough?
July 27th, 2011 - Category: Chores
Recently, an eight-year-old girl returned from her summer vacations. That’s right, vacations. She spent a month with one set of grandparents. Immediately following that trip, she joined her other set of grandparents for two weeks. Then, her parents took their turn by vacationing in California for a week.
Never during those vacations was this girl expected to complete any chores. All laundry, cleaning, meals, and other activities were done for her.
Keep that story in mind as I share an interesting development at one Arizona school district. This particular school has extended the school year from 180 days to 200 days a year. In just one year, the results have been astonishing. Academic achievement has increased as much as 20%. In other words, extra work has led to extra development.
As a parent, you know how important it is for your children to learn the value of work. Unfortunately, vacations, sports, social events and life can get in the way.
Are you doing enough to instill a strong work ethic in your children? Are the chores you expect your children to complete enough to really provide value? By adding just 20 days to a school year, children were able to significantly increase test scores. A little extra effort and looked at what happened academically. What would happen in your family if you were to add a chore or two your chore charts? And, by contrast, what do you think would happen if you were to remove 20 school days. Or…remove chores from your child’s chore chart?
Do you allow vacation time or other interruptions make children exempt from completing chores and being responsible? Whether you’re camping in Yellowstone or riding roller coasters in Disneyland, you can still give your children a chance to work. Even if you’re staying in a hotel, have your children fold their clothes every day. Straighten up the room. Let them clean up their own plates after eating.
The point is…don’t let your child off the hook. No matter what comes up in your life, you can find ways to help your children complete chores or adopt extra responsibility. Giving your children a day off is perfectly fine. But the longer they go without doing anything beneficial, the harder it’s going to be to get back into doing chores. Similarly, if you don’t challenge your children enough, they will be reluctant to work harder when the time comes.
In most situations, extra work brings extra rewards.
Ready to try some extra chores? Be sure to check out MyJobChart.com if you haven’t already.
Summer Activities to Beat the Heat and Get Kids Off the Couch
July 5th, 2011 - Category: Chores
Summer can be hot. And long. And for kids…a little bit boring. As a parent, you don’t understand boredom. There are always chores that need to be done, food to cook, and jobs to go to. You could fill up an entire year just with the stuff that needs to be done right now. Unfortunately, it’s your kids that have the summer off. Not you. But that doesn’t mean you want your kids sitting around for the next few weeks doing nothing.
Here are some great ideas for getting kids off the couch and even getting them to do extra chores (without realizing it):
Start washing your car – if you put on your bathing suit, your kids will naturally wonder what you’re doing. Tell them to “come see.” Then, while you start hosing down the car, toss them a rag. Most kids love the water, and even if it means washing the car, they won’t be able to resist the temptation. You get a clean car. Your child gets outside for a while. And hey, if a water fight breaks out, it’ll be a great time to bond with your children.
Make popsicles or homemade ice cream – got a bunch of dishes in the sink? Then get your kids in the kitchen to help you clean them up. Entice them by asking if they want to make popsicles or homemade ice cream. Once you’re in the kitchen, you could say, “We’ve got to get these dishes cleaned up so we have room to work.” And with that, your dishes are done and you and the kids have a sweet treat to enjoy.
Play “night games” with the kids – remember when you were young and played Kick the Can or Ghost in the Graveyard? It was a lot of fun for you and it would be great for the kids. Because you play at night, you won’t hear any whining about how hot it is. This is also a good activity to get your yard cleaned up. After all, you’ll tell your kids how dangerous a bike, hose, or skateboard could be in the dark. Soon, the toys in the yard will be back in place. And once you get the kids going, you can always return inside while they continue to have some fun. Just be sure you’ve invited a few friends over to join in.
Clean out the closets and save a few dollars – how many shirts and pants with holes do your kids own? Probably a few, right? After all, clothes do wear out. Suggest turning old, holey pants into shorts and give your kids markets and paints to create their own style. Of course, they’ll need to clean out their entire closet to find all the shirts and pants they’d like to “remake” into summer clothes. Then get them playing outside in their “new” outfits.
Pull out the family photos – if you’re like many families, you have photos on the computer, in a box, and hiding in drawers all over the house. All you have to do is show your kids one or two baby pictures of themselves and they’ll be anxious to look at more. Get them to organize your stash as they go through them. This is a great indoor activity that keeps them cool and away from the T.V. And when they’re done, you’ll be ready to fill the photo albums or get the pictures uploaded to digital albums.
Kids don’t like the word chores. But if they haven’t got anything better to do, they’ll eagerly embrace just about anything. So learn how to engage your kids in activities you want done without mentioning work or chores. You’ll be amazed at how quickly the summer passes and how active your kids can become.
Chore Ideas to Challenge Your Child’s Mind
March 29th, 2011 - Category: Chores, Uncategorized
We recently read a magazine article about the intelligence of babies. The article showed how newborns use crying and other physical reactions to communicate with their parents. Unfortunately, most of us are unable to interpret the signals.
This interesting article led us to wonder: if a baby is smart enough to communicate, what are older children capable of? So we came up with a list of chores that might challenge your child’s brain but still be beneficial to your family.
1) Have them plant a garden. Nothing tastes better than fresh fruits and vegetables from the garden. Why not give your child the chance to read and study and learn about when to plant, what to plant and how to plant. Then, weeding and maintaining the garden can be an ongoing chore for your child.
2) Let them organize closets. A little assistance may be required to help your child use space wisely. But let them make the decisions about which items belong where and why. Challenge them to find better ways to put more items in each closet and let them have the responsibility of deciding whether certain items can be donated or thrown out.
3) Give them the chance to build new items. If you just brought a new coffee table home from IKEA, give it to your older children. Give them the chance to read the directions and put the furniture together. This is a great skill for the future and it might be different enough that your child doesn’t even see it as a chore.
4) Encourage them to plan and cook meals. It takes a lot of effort to figure out what ingredients you need or need to buy. Making sure you have enough food for the entire family is also a learning opportunity. This does not have to be an everyday chore, but a meal a week would be great practice.
If our children are capable of greater intelligence, why not use their chore chart to challenge that intelligence? Not only will these chores help your family, but your child may feel a greater sense of satisfaction in doing something challenging then just scrubbing the bathroom all the time.
If you don’t have a system for managing chores with your children, check out MyJobChart.com. And good luck driving your children to great intelligence and responsibility.
Ideas For Kids Chores
June 10th, 2010 - Category: Chores
An article was published a couple weeks ago by one of My Job Chart’s faithful users. Jeannie Cullip, in her article entitled “Chores for the Whole Family,” talks about how chores are a great way to teach kids responsibility. The idea for this post came from her. She lists some of her own great ideas on different chores that you can assign your kids on their chore chart and breaks them down in to age-specific chores. I encourage you to take a look. She offers some great insights.
A lot of our users are asking for suggestions on different chore ideas for their kids. In an effort to satisfy these demands, we’ve come up with a short list of chore ideas for kids. Hopefully some of you can add to this list and we can all share ideas together. Like Jeannie, we’re going to break them up into age categories. The three age groups we will offer ideas for are 4-7yrs, 8-10yrs, and 11-14 yrs.
Chore Ideas for 4-7 Year Old Kids
- Feed the dog and/or other pets
- Pick up toys and other belongings
- Help carry in and put away the groceries
- Dust the window seals and end tables (You can have them dust others things around the house that are not too high for them to reach as well.)
- Put away clean clothes. (You can also teach them how to fold their own clothes and have them fold and put away their clothes on laundry day.)
- Make their bed
- Eat all their vegetables at mealtime (shouldn’t have to be a chore but as most of you probably know it definitely can become one)
Chore Ideas for 8-10 Year Old Kids
- Vacuum all the carpets
- Sweep and mop the floors
- Take out the trash (Also, take the trash can to the curb. May be more appropriate for a little older kids depending on how heavy the trash can is each week.)
- Fold and put away laundry
- Clean and put away dishes
- Wipe down countertops
- Wash windows
- Clean room and bathroom
Chore Ideas for 11-14 Year Old Kids
- Wash the car
- Mow and trim the lawn
- Rake leaves around the yard
- Water the trees and bushes
- Help with doing laundry (teach them how to operate the washer and dryer)
- Prepare simple meals for family mealtime once a week
- Clean out the refrigerator
- Prepare grocery list for the week (be careful they don’t go overboard on the snacks)
These are just a few quick ideas for age specific chores that we were able to come up with. Perhaps you have some ideas of your own and some age specific chores that you use in your household. We’d love to hear your ideas. Please use the comment section below to post your chore ideas to this post. Thanks everybody and happy parenting.
Also, thanks again to Jeannie for her inspiration!